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Archaic: Time has come to envy the dead

04/05/09 || Kampfar

If The Metal Archives are to be believed, which they aren’t when speaking reviews, this Hungarian act up to thrash, +-, is almost entirely downright fucking ace. Na-ah, not so, oh mighty archives. Or rather, oh dude who wrote that review. By all means, Archaic is not a craptastic orchestra, the standard of metal, or rather music, make that humanity in general, entirely too low for that to be more than 10 times truer than, let’s say all words of every last politician I’ve ever seen or heard. But, as already hinted at, total flabbergasting is not on the menu here. Annihilation and torture, however, should be added to the menu of all politricksters regardless of their race, color or belief. ASAP! But now is writing about music time.

“Time to envy the dead” is at its best when the sorry excuse of a vocalist keep his yapper out of the equation. No doubt about it. I promise, had I been involved in this band, on drums perhaps, not that I know shit about drums, I’d tell him to fuck off and never come back. After one song. Max. I’d sit there and blink behind my kit for a while, dumbstruck and speechless by this twat’s inability to connect with the music, then venture into a rant ending with me threating to remove his crap chords the anal-way if not getting the fuck out of eyesight. Perhaps he’s an excellent mechanic, chef or whatever, fuck if I know, but I do know he sounds like an in-the-midst-of-being-choked cow when trying to do extreme-vocals. It’s extremely uninspired, and that’s not the kind of extreme we’re after.

Let’s forget about the layer of manure for a sec and rather concentrate on what isn’t entirely bad on this here platter. I say us because I’m a scizoid. Anyway, the guitar-work is all in all OK, the drums all in all almost OK, and the bass all in all not much here at all. Back to the riffs, performed with a passion they are, not of the red-glowing kind, and not all the time, but quite a few times they come across as genuinely inspired. In addition to quite decent riffagery, more than 5 solos are to be heard, none of which are brilliant, but all of which are good enough to deserve status as highlights on this here thing called “Time to envy the dead”.

Then, before long, comes the vocalist and golden showers-them back to unadulterated boredom, effectively draining, and I’m not exaggerating, the music for 75% of what little energy and goodness it had. And the guy doing the clean vocals on “Memories”, a gay song, should consider never to use his mouth for anything besides talking and cocksucking, too. In fact, the only tune on here not ruined by uninspired you know what is “Tormenter”, a song courtesy of a likewise named band (also) hailing Hungary as home. Enough already, time to do something resembling a summary.

It is a self-release this, and apart from them shit vocals it sounds close to professional, which is a bit like saying Jeffrey Dahmer would’ve been an OK gay hadn’t it been for the fact that he very much enjoyed to torture, rape, (cum) and kill all his lovers into hell. In other words, had I been a label boss, one getting this very album in my mail, I’d reply by telling them to either disband or finish off that thing behind the mic. And, some sacks of anger poured into the mix wouldn’t hurt either.

Request denied.

PS! I considered handing out an even lower score, but since this is a self-release I decided to show a hint of mercy.

4 out of 10.

Information
Released: 2006
Label: Self release
Website: www.myspace.com/thearchaic
Band
Dávid Takács: bass, vocals
László Püski: guitar, vocals
Csaba Zoltán Szabó: drums

Tracklist
01. Intro
02. True death of life
03. Toxic nightmare
04. The archer
05. Cornu
06. Eternal war
07. Memories
08. Thank you!!
09. Tormentor (Tormentor cover)
10. Woodland

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